Janice and I met for tea time at our usual spot on the first Sunday of the month. It’s a standing date of ours as she’s my Law of Attraction buddy, so we meet to work on our manifesting superpowers while enjoying the best micro-roasted java in our neighborhood.
As we settled in, I told her, “I’m really struggling with detachment this month—it’s like my brain is just on ‘replay.’”
“Me, too! What planet can we blame it on—Venus?”
We laughed and decided to let Venus’ retro take the blame. Then we began our conversation in earnest.
The Law of Attraction (L of A) is a pet topic of mine right now because there is just so much nonsense out there about manifesting your desires. I myself was sucked into the easy, pop culture version of getting what you want, but, like many of my clients and friends, found that those methods totally didn’t work. Rather than getting cynical—tempting as that is—I went on a mission to discover how I realistically could make it work. The Law of Attraction is a powerful and real attribute of the Universe. But sister, it ain’t easy. Let’s get into what this law is really about and how to develop it as one of your superpowers.
Are You A Believer?
I’m going to say this straight up: if you don’t believe in something, then this law likely isn’t going to work for you. Whether you take the spiritual approach or the scientific angle, a fundamental aspect of the L of A is belief in a creative Universe. From God to quantum physics, there is a whole spectrum of ways to trust in the power of the human consciousness to create its reality.
Can You Just Shut Up?
Your monkey mind, that is. Central to using the L of A is the ability to quiet and focus the mind. Deepak Chopra—arguably a guy who has manifested a pretty good life—says that the first step to using what he calls the “Law of Intention and Desire” is to slip into the “gap.” The place of no mind, the space between inhaling and exhaling, the silence that exists—maybe only for nanoseconds—in-between thoughts.
In other words, to really make this law work, you need a meditative practice. It is inside the gap—in the brainwaves of alpha, theta, even delta—where you move past the lizard brain screaming out its alarms of scarcity and fear and release your desires to the Universe.
You’ve also got to shut out those negative, soul-sucking thought patterns that insist that you are powerless, too young, too old, too weird, too stupid—whatever. Instead, see yourself as a creative being with power over her own life. This will be easier with some kind of spiritual practice, but it isn’t necessary as long as you are aware. So, whether your thing is therapy, Tarot cards, prayer, or self-help books, work on opening your conscious awareness of your Self.
Tips for Manifesting
Once you’ve quieted your mind, you can start working the process of manifestation. Practicing this law is actually fairly simple—not to be confused with easy! But isn’t creating the life you want worth the effort?
Here is a basic framework for working with the L of A.
Make a list of what you desire. Look at it several times a day, daydream about it, and imagine what it would be like to have these things. Read the list aloud, then take it into the gap—a meditation space—with you. Visualize releasing your list to the Universe. Practice trusting that you are giving these desires to something else—God, your higher self, the matrix. Do this every day, maybe even twice a day. Unwavering focus on what you want is key.
• Don’t tell anybody what you want, unless they are true supporters and aligned with your best good. This is where a buddy can be helpful. Amalie and I believe in each other 100%, but remember that there are many people with reasons to smack your desires down—even if they love you.
• Release attachment to the outcome. Yeah. I know. The kicker. Because if you weren’t attached, you wouldn’t want it, right? Your meditation practice will help with detachment, but you have to really focus because most of us are grasping, scared, and hungry inside. We think things have to be a certain way. But when you’ve gotten something you wanted, was it exactly as you thought it might be? From jobs to lovers to dream abodes, usually there’s something you didn’t anticipate, and often it turns out even better than we imagined. That’s because we typically dream pretty small, and the Universe dreams big. So if we can trust, we can open ourselves to receiving the best version of what we want.
• Let the Universe handle the details. Remember the adage, “don’t worry about the how, just put it out there.” Letting go of controlling every detail helps you release attachment.
• Don’t try to manifest specific people doing specific things. Stick with your own desires. There are many other Laws of the Universe at play that also need to be followed for big stuff to really manifest, so just focus on you.
When you start working with the L of A, I recommend you embrace it for a good long time, like a workout regime or taking a class. Start smallish. Play with fun stuff like manifesting a certain article of clothing at the thrift store or a free cup of coffee. Once you see how this works, you can build your confidence for bigger things.
The Law of Attraction is not a vending machine from God dispensing Ferraris, diamond necklaces, and perfect boyfriends. It’s a spiritual law that is extremely effective but also takes some real energy on your part. Mediocre attention to manifestation will yield mediocre results. It does get easier with practice, but, like anything, you’ve got to do the work. Or play, as I like to think of it.
Consciously or unconsciously, our minds are always broadcasting signals of attraction. The more conscious we can become with manifestation, the more effectively we can create what we want (as opposed to what we don’t want, the specialty of the subconscious). Working on yourself is the way to becoming more aware and more powerful in your own life.