Saying that moving on after a painful break-up or loss takes time is just an understatement because it takes more than that. Self-reflection is more important when we desire to move on since we already have painful questions that need answers because a part of us is already lost, and all the plans we made, dreams we shared, and the same commitments we had thrown away.
This personal process involves the following 4 initiatives:
- Acknowledge your honest, fresh emotions
Embrace the emotional situation you’re in honestly and without discrimination. Engaging in activities such as drinking, self-denial, or even waiting for the loss to stop hurting won’t make you feel better. Acknowledge your situation and be sad, cry, yell, and sob when you need to. This is a way of showing that you value and honor whatever you’ve lost.
This is not the time to regret or hate yourself, as those just make everything more complicated. Accept that whatever happened has happened; that is the only way you can control yourself. Acknowledge your problems the same way you would acknowledge an orphan with both arms.
- Allow yourself to be helped
Allow yourself to be cared for. Friends and family are just some of the few individuals who are ready to support you if you allow them to. You do not have to change your behaviors, just be yourself and in your current situation, be it mourning and grieved self. Do not try to hide anything; allow real support to be there for you. Be true to your pain and let others help you overcome them. Be open, and don’t control how you feel.
- Integrate the experience into your being
Contemplate the impact of that relationship and break up or that loss only after healing. What are the contributions of that person and that experience toward your well-being? What did you achieve?
Ponder if the next time you’ll open your heart, it will have learned something and if you’ll be more careful and open. Acknowledge the fact that you’ve made progress in healing yourself. Build yourself back by embracing your weaknesses.
- Get ready for the new
You’ll be ready for a new chapter of life once you have gone through sadness, support, and integration. You will be stronger and firm as your progress into the future through the help of your intuitions and encounters. You will be able to do everything you weren’t capable of, and those who gave you a shoulder to lean on will always be there. Therefore, be thankful and show them love. It’s now time for you to experience happiness after days of pain. Happiness will be part of you; don’t send it away. You deserve to continue living.
Moving on doesn’t Mean Forgetting
Moving on means, you have become a new self unknowingly but magnificently. It doesn’t mean doing away with the pain. Reflecting on who you are and your needs—wishing and visioning. It means going through hard times to come out stronger and more well-developed.
Moving on is like being born again. It’s a painful and long journey. It needs to believe in what you don’t know, just like birth. But when it eventually happens, it becomes worth it.