A broken heart may feel like the end of the world. You have never felt so depressed and disappointed. No amount of pain has ever felt so concentrated. It’s like a giant hole into your chest, with no hope of getting fixed or repaired.
You cry and scream inside your heart every day and no one can hear you, nothing seems to smooth your heartbreak or soothe the pain you feel.
When we invest our time, our emotions, and our hearts to build a life with a partner, we feed our hope and nurture our happiness. A break up doesn’t only destroy that happiness but also destroy any hope of ever finding love again.
The question is: How can we move on? How to survive and avoid being stuck in the pain of a breakup?
- Rebuild yourself
Love enhances self-growth. As you spend more time together, the lines between you and your partner become invisible. So there is no surprise that when a relationship ends, people experience unbearable pain. Your sense of self shrinks and you may feel lost and unsure of who you are. So, it’s time to rebuild yourself. It’s time to try new things and spend more time with new people. One of the most important actions you can take to heal a broken heart is to expose yourself to new people and rebuild new relationships.
- Cut off all communication with your ex
Do not call, text or email your ex. If your ex is trying to reach out to you, don’t reply. You can even consider blocking your ex. Give yourself a minimum of 3 months while you detach emotionally from your ex.
If you have children together, try to limit your interactions as much as possible.
If you don’t have any reason (like children) to speak after 3 months, consider a full break up from that person with no communication. Otherwise, you your pain will continue and you will have a hard time moving on.
- Explore potential areas of interest for you
It’s never too late to be the person you have always wanted to be! Try new food, explore new hobbies, and find potential areas that interest you every day.
Pick up a new skill and develop it. For example, try glass-blowing, ceramics, a new instrument, or diving.
Invite your friends to try these new activities with you if you prefer.
- Volunteering will help you see the real world
Volunteering in your community can show you how fortunate you are to have everything you do. Find a local homeless shelter, nursing home or school to volunteer at and focus on helping others.
- Try a new look
Change your haircut, color, or style. Buy new clothes and give away anything you no longer wear . New look will help you enhance your self-esteem.
- Make a list of your good qualities
Breakups can make you feel really down about yourself. It’s common to blame yourself after a breakup, and this may lead to damaging your self-esteem. Take some time to think about all of your strengths. Write them down and remind yourself of them every day.
- Learn lessons from the experience
No matter how difficult are things happen to us. The question is can we learn from the experience? If we don’t learn our lessons, we will keep doing the same thing over and over again and getting the same response. So during this time of hurt, you might want to ask yourself some important questions about your broken relationship. For example, did you have open communication with your ex partner? Did you trust your ex? Were you able to see things from each other’s perspective
Answers to similar questions can help you be a deeper person, and better equipped for your next relationship.